All in Journal

5 Months

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Grief, Journal

The first time that they were brought into the house, before they’d been split up, I thought I was going to throw up. The thought that you were now encased in a plastic bag in a plastic box in my living room brought me to my knees.

The confusion of grief

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Grief, Journal

The mail is addressed to him. It’s from the school that he applied to and wanted to start in the fall. I’ve let them know and tried to unsubscribe from their communication, but everything seems lost in translation.

The road back

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Journal, Grief

After being in Southern California for the last month+, I am now back in Montana. Being back in LA gave me time to have a little bit of closure for the place that I’ve always lived. When I left, I felt rushed to say goodbye to people and it was so soon after Tommy’s death

Rosemary

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Journal, Grief

They wrapped their arms around me and told the police officer that they’d take care of me. I went to the hospital and when I returned home, they were there.

Visits to the ER

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Journal, Grief, Diary

Today was the first day that I had a physical reaction to the trauma of losing Tommy since I’ve been back in LA. Here I am today, short of breath, trying to suppress the panic that I feel inside. The physical pain of this is real.

On my mind... accidental v. ?

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Journal, Grief

I want to start by saying in my old life, I didn’t realize the compassion that is necessary for dealing with the disease of addiction and those who suffer from it. Not to say that I didn’t have compassion for those who were struggling, but until it was actually pointed out to me, I didn’t realize how critical compassion is.


Where I live now

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Journal

I live in a small town now. You’ve visited t his town with me 3 times and for that I’ll be forever grateful. I thought you’d be here with me now, but things don’t always go as planned.

Social Media Landmines

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Journal

August 10th was the day that I saw the first post about one of Tommy’s friends moving in to their dorm, to begin their new life in college. Today is the day I am realizing that social media…

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